Sunday, September 21, 2008

do you want sauce with that?

Sauce was the only child that was a complete accident not exactly planned.

When Kenyon and I first began talking about having children, he said he wanted to have them close together, "like 18 months apart," to which I put my large foot down and said, "No way. Try three years apart."

I argued that kids 18 months apart would be having two babies at once. I had read all the parenting articles that said that two and a half to three years apart is ideal for siblings.

Well, when Hunter was about eight months old, Kenyon got promoted within his company and we prepared to move to Utah. Kenyon had to complete two weeks of training for his new position and fly out to Utah to look for a new home for us while I got our ends tied up in Florida.

We only saw each other for a few brief days within those weeks.

Let's just say that distance really does make the heart grow fonder - and impulsive.

Soon we found ourselves surrounded by moving boxes in our new home in the west. One night we sat in our living room and I made the remark that I was so tired and the only time I could remember being this tired was when I was pregnant with Hunter.

"You should take a test," replied my husband.

"NOOOO!!!!" was my shocked reply.

A few days later, I couldn't resist putting my curiosity to rest so I took a pregnancy test. It was positive and I was in pure shock.

I didn't tell Kenyon immediately, but left the test on the top of the tank of the toilet and asked Kenyon to get me my glasses that I thought I left there.

He came out with the test in his hand and a huge smile on his face.

I immediately started to cry.

I didn't feel ready. This wasn't my plan for our family. I still had a 10 month old nursing baby and I felt very protective of my love for him. I didn't want to share it with anyone else just yet.

"This is wonderful news!" encouraged my sweet husband.

I crumpled into his arms and had my one and only cry about being pregnant. From that point on, I was thrilled to be pregnant again.

Although we didn't find out gender at the ultrasound, Sauce's real name was always one of our top choices for boys names. Kenyon was particularly passionate about it and even lobbied for the choice by coming home from a professional baseball game with a jersey he purchased with the name on the back.

He wore it around without saying a word. I laughed and was absolutely sold.

Sauce decided to arrive three weeks before his projected due date (which I think was a little off to begin with). My water broke at 5:45 a.m. on September 21, 2002. I leaped out of bed and ran for the bathroom. When I had my wits about me and realized what was going on, I took a shower and got ready to leave for the hospital.

My labor was half the time of my first time around, but felt ten times harder. I am so grateful that I had my midwife Tina supporting me every moment at the hospital. It felt like labor was moving slowly, but I had no idea what slow really was until I started pushing.

I pushed my brains out for an hour and a half (triple the time of Hunter's delivery), and although one of my goals for this birth was to avoid another episiotomy, in the final moments, I begged Tina to give me one if necessary.

As that moment of relief finally arrived, we realized WHY it was necessary. The boy was "sunny side up," or posterior presentation and that combined with his big, fat, huge head equaled a tough birth experience.

I always tell Sauce that when Tina put him on my chest and I wrapped my arms around him, he grabbed my fingers and our eyes connected.

And my love just doubled.

Our friend Susan was at his birth video taping every painful and joy filled moment. In the quiet recovery room, she dubbed him "Camsauce" and never in a million years would I have guessed that it would stick....

but to this very day, he is our Sauce.

Little Sauce threw me for a loop in babyhood. He didn't follow my rules of sleeping and eating and being happy. Don't get me wrong, he was a happy baby, but he was so much more high maintenance that Brendan ever was. He wanted to be held a lot more and cried a lot more at nap and bedtimes.

He gave us a clear sign of his passions by his first word. "Ball"

He was our earliest walker and is our athlete and sports fanatic. Sauce has a smile that can light up a room and even strangers notice it.

Sauce is such a good friend, particularly to his brothers.

Love is a verb to Sauce. He acts on his love toward others. Whether it is a hug, a wrestle, a favor, a kind act or a compliment, he puts his love in action - and I love that about him.

I am so glad that God knows better than I do about plans for my life. I am so thankful that I was surprised with our Camsauce and my faith was increased by God's perfect plan for our family. In the end, 18 months apart was simply perfect!

Happy birthday Sauce. I hope you feel "verb-loved" because you have our hearts.


  1. happy bday cameron! can you believe that he is that old already?!

  2. He can't be that old. I remember when you told me you were pregnant - wasn't it yesterday?

    The Z's love Cameron! Happy Birthday Big Boy.

  3. What a beautiful post!

    It's funny because I have been thinking about the fact that my son was born less than a year after my daughter was born. After I took my first pregnancy test, I jumped in the car to buy another and I CRIED SO HARD all the way to Walgreens. I was so sad.

    But now? It is among my top gifts in my life. My little boy has brought me such moments of peace and comfort over this past year and he's only four. I have no doubt that he was meant to be.

    I can't wait to see the slideshow!

  4. The big 6! Happy Birthday, Cameron!

  5. So cute!! Happy Birthday to your boy!!

    My water also broke with #2, and he was also sunnyside up!! I agree it was not a fun labor!

    Please if you get a chance, will you email me. I created a montage of Erik Daniel's birth at one true media. I have tried for weeks to figure out how to get the screen on my blog like you did. I can get a link to come up, but I can't figure out how to get the screen to come up. If you don't mind, will you help me????

  6. When I first started reading...I thought you were going to say you were prego....

    Hope his b-day was fabulous. Want to come visit?

  7. Happy Birthday Cameron! My oldest two were 19-months apart and I thought it was perfect!!


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Messy and wonderful perfectly describes my life as a wife and mom of five. I'm passionate about advocating for orphans by telling their stories and encouraging adoption and orphan care. My schedule is messy and wonderful as I am charged with four sons and one daughter. We love living in our little mountain ski town. We do a little camping, a little skiing, a little hunting, and a lot of laughing and loving. Life is dirty and loud around here but we wouldn't want it any other way. Okay, maybe a little less dirty!

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